genesis

I must rightly apologize for any confusion with my Blogs. Google has made it impossible for my sanity, to continue with my previous blog.
no worries it was not your (you as in the reader) fault. it was an email mishap.

UPDATE!

today i stumbled upon writings posted in a facebook note format. they were created long ago and had a nostalgic impact upon my already unstable cranium. i used to write. how crazy does that sound? these writings were ambiguous and vague and very specific. reading them now brings back more memories and feelings than any straightforward explanation of events ever could. and then a thought occurred to me. it slithered into my brain and soothed the anxious drum and ho hum of personal monotony. personality monotony?

i am always so bottled with the desire to express an idea or a sequence of events but dread the tedium of social media. not to mention any names. not only do i dread the dreadfulness of the very idea of these media outlets, i stand, (or rather curl up in a fetal state) shaking with... dare i admit... fear.
however silly it is, i don't quake with the F word that my ideas may not be accepted, for this i have always understood, but rather the pain of knowing that by printing sequences of events on paper (or on virtual paper may it be) i might be adding not only to the monotony of social media but to the pointless and purposeless chatter that clouds mind. that clouds my mind.

bear with me i am approaching a personally significant notion.

i wish to update those who i care for (and those who in return care for me) with those sequences of events that make up the most wonderful, however not-so-awe-inspiring they may be, life that i share with the most remarkable (for lack of a stronger, more impactful word) man who ever did exist in the realm that affects itself on my life. in order to accurately and satisfyingly produce these "updates" i can only, and will only be able to keep hold of my sanity (for a small window it is between my sanity and my insanity), if i tell them as the appear to me through my narrow and obscure mind. in a syntax that may only be right and acceptable when viewed through that small vision in my brain.

please be warned and apologized in advance. these basic, thrown together scatter thoughts are how i can best express the events that surround, and create, my life. and by my life, i mean that life that is shared by me and my eternal companion, the one man i will ever love, Dan.

if you made it all the way through my musings. mad props.
thank you.